My Judaism

 My Judaism is singing with my husband’s Friday night kiddush because every single person
who makes kiddush has a different tune and I like his best of all. 

 

My Judaism is the particular way we sing bentsching and the idiosyncratic way we make
havdalah and the handwashing song we made up when our kids were young that they find
humiliating now but is still so sweet in my ear. 

 

My Judaism is my hands kneading challah dough in my kitchen in Israel because I dreamed
of that for so many years before we could come and also the motzei that I make on the challah
that I made, no matter who sits at our Shabbat table because we looked it up and I can. 

 

My Judaism is bentching my children on Friday nights when they are with us because they are
with us so rarely now that they are grown. 

 

My Judaism is the words of Tehillim that are worn into grooves in my brain because I am
friends with many chapters of Tehillim, which is really surprising considering how I mostly
avoid the siddur and definitely avoid shul whenever possible, even though my husband is a rabbi. 

 

My Judaism is picturing every doorway of my home when I say Shema in bed at night. 

 

My Judaism isn’t shy AT ALL about alerting others that something - a prayer, a mechitza,
a comment, a seating arrangement, an opinion - slights women. 

 

My Judaism is teaching others something I learned and that I find fascinating
and I want someone else to find it fascinating as well. 

 

My Judaism is giving charity because I really believe that’s what God wants me to do
and my Judaism is not being shy about asking the people who come to my door to ask
for money to pray for the people I love. 

 

My Judaism is studying a chapter of Tanach a day, knowing it will take years to finish. 

 

My Judaism is Jewish books and books and books, on every surface.

 

My Judaism is the view of the rolling hills of Judea from the back porch of my apartment
in the portion of land that was given to the Tribe of Yehuda. 

 

My Judaism is emunah and more emunah and gratitude always because that’s how
I feel closest to God. 

 

My Judaism is crying from joy and crying from the privilege of living in the Land of Israel. 

 

My Judaism is the song of Jerusalem, the music of saying Yerushalayim. 

 

My Judaism is craving awareness of God, always and always. 

 

My Judaism is the tingle of the breath of Moshiach constantly on the back of my neck
because I really really really believe he’s that close.